It’s a Small World….


This is an offence against humanity and must surely be proscribed by the Geneva Convention?

Never before in the history of human endeavour have so many creepy revolting cookie cutter racially stereotyped animatronic singing plastic dollies been so much in need of a Mongol Horde sweeping in to do some judicious and long overdue beheading. Never before has a soundtrack to a theme ride sounded more in need of a David Koresh to flush out, screaming from his compound and begging for mercy (although of course self -immolation seems infinitely preferable to even a millisecond of the Small World theme)

Small World represents, even encapsulates everything I most dislike about the Disney ethos, the one micron thick avuncular paternalistic face of rabidly offensive capitalism, the carcinogenically saccharine sentiment, the rictus grin, the general jiggery pokery fakery of it all. .. lets all smile.. and join hands so we cant stab each other in the back-ness..
Horrible horrible, beyond horrible. I definitely would not have bought this even if I was eight years old, and I am certain my own daughter would never ever ever do anything but want to destroy this abomination, preferably with high explosives. If you enjoy the schmaltz of a Hamley’s Christmas display this is probably enjoyable and and if you don’t think thats funny or creepy or sinister you probably arent English. At All.

Sorry. I *really* don’t do Disney. I tried though..