Restoration


Trying to recapture
Thoughts and dreams like light
Falling through cracks
At the back of the shuttered casements
Of our lives
We turn we shift
Into a fifth dimension
As an act of Faith
A twist of Fate
Or Hope
Or desperate clutching at straws
Concealing the flaws
Glazed, fired, dried,
We ride the currents, whirling
Flailing for light
We cling ever tighter
To something or nothing
That we can understand


Rage against Fate


What is it, that you and I should come to this?
Betrayed embrace, betrayers kiss
Misunderstandings
Obliquity of mind
Those were the worst of times
These are the best of times
What is it, that you and I should come to this?

Who sanctioned you at birth to burn me deep?
For I was good; am good, I will keep
Your poison in my bottle while you sleep
Those were the best of times
These are the worst of times
Who sanctioned you at birth to use your teeth?


Holding On


You hold my heart in your hand, unheeding
A curio to you, though mine, is thine
Dropping from your slender fingers, bleeding,
A proffered challenge throughout both space and time

Nothing has vanished from this contented life.
Just a shadow, ghostly, fleeting fades
Continuance both of blessings and of strife,
It is an inner shadow blights my days

For I have won the battle, but lost the war
It’s said that nothing good can last forever
A gentle love, transformed from that before
Those wanton silken threads are yours to sever

Yet I through time unchanging, constant be
The choice to touch, or go, was yours alone
Understanding that I long to see
A time at hand when we can be as one

But I must release from all obligation
Your faithless love, but glamour to my eye
Your sharp distance scissors my delusion
A hopeless love bids you a long goodbye


Hands


When life was simple,
Dimpled,
These plump, pink hands,
Now turned to lizards
Grey and white,
Blue and bruised
By life’s long
Corridor of experience
Gnarled and scarred,
Drained of blood
And stained;
A habit, which will be
The end of me
Kills, in the end,
Untended friends
Who serve without complaint, or
Vanity
Left and right and naked,
Functional, to task
This mother’s bitter iron grasp,
A badge of this humanity


Love and War


At war with myself
And bisected by his love and gentleness
My own hard shell enclosing more
Like Baboushka Dolls, unlovable.
Inspiring alternating passions
Like battling internecine factions
Born to confuse, cajole, enrage
Incandescent with violence and brutality
Yet
He betrays me
My oblivious Judas
Exposing love and rage
He cannot lie for me or receive my adoration
Yet lies with me, man, woman
Tough as leather
As I caress and stone to death
His innocence with my feathered kiss
He comes between me inside my bliss
And stones me altogether


Cyanide Snides


Slide and jive, snide and jibe
Your half-life on this stage
In this clinical theatre of threat and menace
You operate your sugar surgery
Strapping down, in gowns
Your coached conversations
Buckled at the knees you suck
Poached perspiration
This mutual ingestion
Injecting toxins to feed
The Cyanide Snides needs;
Your greed
Open hearts
Affections infected
You’re threading the needle
Making stitches to suit you
Cracked mirrors reflect
Your bitterest pill
And barbed wire sutures

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I suppose this is a hymn to all those people who enjoy hurting peoples feelings and putting them down who then turn around to say “it’s for your own good” as if it was their job to make the world better somehow by being as horrible as possible about someone else’s appearance or ability (or lack of) People can only change themselves. They need encouragement not disparagement.


Ghost Town


This place
A place I know so well
Where I am known
Where I now stand
Alone
Is strangely hollow to the bone
And full of shades of
Days, now gone
Shadows, dark corners hide
A haemorrhage of friends
Inside dappled deeps
Keeping their secrets in silence
The living have all moved away or on, or back
Where they belong
Yet I stay
A tiny dot, insignificant
Rooted to the spot
I hear them say
“We’ll keep in touch. It’s been great!
Love you very much, Best Mate!”
And smiling for their sakes through all the pain
My choices seem to dwindle
As their voices fade away